Twitter Thoughts – 20160228


Irregular and incomplete collection of various snark that I published on social media (mainly twitter) in the last few months.


 

“Design like you’re right, listen like you’re wrong.”

Todays Action Plan: 1. Doo 2. Bee 3. Doo. 4. Bee 5. Doo

Dear Americans, universal health care means you can have guilt free, risky, adventurous sex.

Good engineers make small mistakes. Great engineers make huge mistakes and blame it on the good engineers.

My 2016 Prediction: Most of you will spend a large part of 2016 looking at your smartphone and computer.

This thing has bugs in it. Can I get my purchase order back ?

Being snarky doesn’t solve anything but I feel better. I learned that in Sales perception is reality so things are now better.

The charm of a killer, the smile of a sales grunt.

A positive attitude won’t save you from dying but it will annoy everyone around you.

I’m good at keeping my inner awesome under control.

Its Feb 2016. For network engineers, its still February 2002. Nothing has really changed since then.

I’m training this customer to stamp his foot and shout “discount”. Its my version of “bad uncle” that teaches kids to swear.

Was told today that my “banged my knee” face and “hey the vendor sales grunt is here” face are the same.

For every positive outcome of Enterprise IT, there is an ITIL process waiting to prevent it.

Now imagine that we redistribute those RIP routes into BGP using a policy. No, more like a head-on car crash at 60mph.

New Years 1985 – disco, dance, alcohol, car seat sex, 1995 – dinner with friends, hotel sex. 2000 – on call/site for Y2K. 2005 – party with friends with kids. 2015 – [already asleep]

When I return from a well deserved holiday, I will delete all of my unread email. If its important, then you can send it again after 7th January.